Mother's Day isn't always a happy day of celebration for everyone. If you don't love this holiday, join us in redefining the meaning of motherhood and making this day your own by being your own mom.
At Pevonia, we celebrate every type of mom — even if that means you becoming your own mother! If you aren't getting the love you need, there is no time like the present to carve out a way to make that happen for yourself! Whatever you wish you’d been taught or given, you can give yourself those things now!
Redefining Mom
As the term “mom” has evolved, we appreciate all the fabulous souls who take on this responsibility, from the wisdom shared to the selfless comfort, acceptance, and support given. Whether you embody the conventional mom role or stepped into it as a stepmom, foster mom, pet mom, or parent to your own mom or family members, these relationships (or lack thereof) can be complicated.
Perhaps your mother figure was absent or not “Mrs. Brady”, or maybe you weren't the child you wished you'd been and have some guilt or aftermath you are dealing with. Whatever your circumstances, you can give yourself a do-over by acting like the parent you wish you’d had now.
B.Y.O.M - Be Your Own Mom
Although B.Y.O.M. typically refers to “bring your own meeting,” in a sense, when reparenting yourself, you are doing just that—meeting yourself exactly how and where you are and providing the tools you need to thrive.
Be the good parent you wish you'd had growing up through kind, encouraging ways of nurturing yourself and learning how to take care of your basic and higher needs.
You can begin by asking yourself if you are caring for your basic needs. Perhaps mom or dad ate poorly, had no semblance of a regular sleep-wake cycle, rarely exercised, or had a series of toxic relationships. While discovering areas you didn't receive the tools to be a healthy, happy, productive, and fulfilled adult, it is essential to focus on the facts today, not the faults of the past. You can reparent yourself now without blaming them for not setting a good example of prioritizing health.
If you struggle with basic hygiene, nutrition, sleep, and exercise, then get started by researching and implementing some of the recommended suggestions. Set some concrete, actionable, measurable, and time-bound goals with deadlines to improve your quality of life.
What about personal safety? Setting and keeping healthy boundaries and protecting yourself from toxic people or situations is a fabulous way to reparent yourself.
Log each activity and assess your progress without judgement. As you proceed, you will be rewiring your mind and body. Notice how self-esteeming it can be to follow through. Once you've mastered the basics, you can start taking steps toward meeting your higher needs.
How to Reparent Yourself
This self-care process is about forging a healthier relationship with yourself - being your own best friend. Journaling and practicing mindfulness to get acquainted with the child within will help identify your unmet needs and uncover any unresolved trauma.
Should significant trauma or mental health issues be part of your story, engage a mental health professional for reparenting therapy to help you heal interpersonal wounds. For other areas, there are reparenting exercises you can do on your own to create the order, inspiration, support, and companionship we all crave (whether we know it now or not). Come along and join us on this loving, reparenting journey.
Be Your Own (Needs) Manager
Should you lack discipline or structure in your life, imagine what being your own boss looks like and engage in baby steps to instill a sense of balance in your life. Rather than blaming mom or dad for not being disciplined role models for healthy sleep, nutrition, or exercise habits, as an adult, you can decide what is healthy for you.
By now, you’ve probably learned the hard way what happens when you don’t get enough sleep, eat unhealthy food, or fail to get your blood pumping. Fortunately, you can learn from these (and other) “mismanagement” mistakes. Empower yourself by establishing healthier habits like regular sleep-wake cycles, a nutritious diet, and regular exercise, showing that you can act within your personal limits to manage your life well. Discipline is all about balance and follow-through. Reasonable self-discipline is a healthy pathway toward building self-esteem, a sense of accomplishment, and agency versus harshly driving yourself like a drill sergeant. If you are an overachiever, focus on gentle self-care instead, not depriving yourself or denying yourself rest and recreation. Go swing on the monkey bars, dig in the dirt, or color in a coloring book while releasing any expectations.
Be Your Own Mood-Maker
Do you validate or criticize your emotions? Emotional regulation and validation will help you live a happier life. Cultivate a more positive mindset and attitude by filling yourself with healthy messages. Supplanting negative self-talk or abusive voices in your head with positive self-talk, speaking, and listening to yourself like you wish your maternal figure had is a fabulous way to reparent yourself. This rewiring is key for showing yourself you matter. After all, give-and-take communication is the bedrock of healthy relationships, and the relationship with yourself is the most important, as it will last your entire lifetime.
Remember, you have the power to change your life for the better. When things get rough, take some time to self-soothe and do something nice for yourself. Here are some top self-soothing activities:
Turn on calming music, letting the harmonic notes carry your angst away.
Dab a calming aromatherapy oil onto temples and wrists and breathe deeply.
Swaddle yourself in a cozy comforter or a weighted blanket, like a warm hug.
Sip a cup of herbal tea or hot chocolate, allowing yourself a mental break.
Meditate and visualize peaceful places that make you feel calm.
Read or listen to a podcast to take your mind off your stress.
Take a walk in nature to clear away the mental clutter.
Try the happy baby yoga pose and rock yourself gently.
Book a facial or a massage at a spa near you.
Be Your Own Muse
Maybe you wish you had received more praise or attention growing up, and your life lacks joy and motivation. Consider being your own muse. You might be surprised at how powerful your inner champion can be! Here are some ways to rekindle your spark:
Pay attention to your good qualities or talents.
Explore a new hobby or creative endeavor, like signing up for music lessons.
Pen your autobiography, jot down a poem, or capture nature with your camera.
Practice daily affirmations of your uniqueness.
Acknowledge yourself for what you did right today.
Be Your Own Master Chef
Perhaps you yearn for cooking know-how, kitchen savvy, or memories of cooking with your family. Watch cooking videos or take a cooking class to meet other like-minded people and get your oven mitts dirty. Practice makes perfect! Remember, even the best chefs throw out the first pancake (or have burned an expensive roast!)
Be Your Own Memory Creator
While you can’t fabricate memories, you can make new ones. Establish new traditions for heart-warming experiences. Plan bake-offs, spa parties, getaways, or other fun activities with friends to create new stories you’ll enjoy sharing.
If your contact list is small or lacks meaningful relationships, make new friends by joining a meet-up for whatever hobby you fancy. Whatever you do, try your best to be present and acknowledge that you are making new connections and memories you’ll be able to treasure for years.
Be Your Own Museum Curator
So, you don't have meaningful heirlooms or keepsakes tied to a mother figure. Hit flea markets, garage or estate sales, and thrift stores to curate a hand-selected treasure trove of items that make you feel warm and cozy.
Be Your Own Makeover Artist
So, you didn’t have a mom who showed you the ropes for how to maximize your appearance? As the word “mom” is getting a makeover, you can become a self-taught DIY beauty maven to give yourself a makeover, too!
Start with an at-home facial - the ultimate for self-care. What you’ll need to complete your facial:
The Spa Box - Hyaluronic Acid HydraBoost Spa-At-Home Experience, which comes with a spa headband, how-to-use instructions, and practically everything else you’ll need for a de-aging skincare treat.
You’ll love how the Hyaluronic Acid Hydra-Mist, Hyaluronic Acid Hydra-Serum, Lumafirm® Repair Cream - Lift & Glow, and our fan-favorite, the Marine Collagen Cream, plump fine lines and wrinkles and illuminate your skin, making you look like nobody’s mother!
- Eye Make-Up Remover
Gentle Exfoliating Cleanser and/or Enzymo-Sphérides Peeling Cream
- Ageless Skin Collagen Mask
Once you witness the fantastic results, you’ll want to dive deeper into our other de-aging products.
Next, find the perfect “mom-some” collection to address your skin’s unique needs daily:
Did mom (or dad) fail to counsel you to wash your face at night? Get in the daily habit of managing early signs of aging with the Pevonia Power Repair® Collection — the perfect age-prevention love pat.
Or perhaps your mother didn’t remind you to apply sunscreen. If so, the Micro-Retinol® Collection will help unwind the sun damage you unwittingly acquired.
If you now qualify as a chronologically experienced person, the Stem Cells Phyto-Elite® Collection will instruct your skin cells to behave like they should for welcome motherly guidance.
Can’t stop furrowing or frowning? The Myoxy-Caviar® Collection will gently scold your dynamic wrinkles to relax, minimizing mature skin concerns.
And, even if mom forgot to remind you to apply sun protection, you can create a new healthy, daily habit of using Pevonia sunscreen — the ultimate pro-aging defense.
And, for your healthiest self ever, visit Find A Spa for an oasis near you offering Pevonia to boost skin health with an expert consultation and professional de-aging treatment for your specific concerns.
For hair and nails, watch online videos or enlist the help of a professional hairstylist and manicurist to achieve a brand-new look! Be sure to budget the time to maintain your cut, color, and manicure to stay looking polished.
Then, enlist a personal shopper or stylist or check out clothing subscription boxes for a wardrobe overhaul. Let them style you and make you look like you were born with a knack for dressing and accessorizing like a fashionista.
How does it feel to B.Y.O.M.? We think it looks good on you!
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